Saturday, 26 March 2016

the life you were born to live

first, let me say that I have been in the grip of a nasty cold for a week, which has gone to my chest and made me rather cranky.  In addition to cranky, it's been a time for quiet introspection with feelings of edginess and anxiety thrown into the mix.

I guess when we're sick our energy goes towards healing and has less power to cover up our vulnerability.

I know that this was so just before my fibromyalgia was diagnosed: I had no barrier between the world and my heart.  I did a lot of crying- some tears because I was so very exhausted, and some  because innocent-meaning comments wounded me, for no other reason than my super sensitivity.

We have a book that Brian often refers to-   The Life You Were Born to Live  a guide to finding your life purpose by Dan Millman.  Through using Millman's  sequence of numerical counting in relation to the day you were born, a specific set of numbers is revealed.  These 3 numbers 'shed light on our key issues and potential; they do not describe who we are.'

'I am a 21/3 
 the number on the right of the / being the most significant
3: expression and sensitivity
1: creativity and confidence
2: cooperation and balance

Briefly, what Millman says about 21/3s' life path, is that we are here to work through issues of creativity, emotional expression, balance, and cooperation in support of people or causes, applying our 'energy in positive, constructive ways to teach, uplift, and inspire.'

On the liability side, people with 3 as one of their numbers see and can express the negative side of things.  In a chapter titled The Law of Choices, Millman writes 'The most basic choice we have in life is whether to expand or contract, whether to bring our creative and expressive energies out into the world in positive or negative ways.  No matter what our circumstances, we have the power to choose our directions.'

Do you hear that.....we have a choice here!

Being a 'super-sensitive' 21/3 helps me see and embrace beauty in its many forms.  It also compels me to express what I experience.  I believe that this expressive energy has been the constant and essential component in my art-making through the years.

So too has it influenced my verbal self-expression.  It is important for me to share my authentic feelings honestly and directly.  This frequently gets me into trouble as this truth-telling hasn't yet been honed to have smoother edges.

Millman writes that '3s have a large emotional field.  This extended emotional nervous system of energetic "feelers" reaches out 'into the environment, leaving them wide open and extremely vulnerable to others' emotions.'

 I remember telling my friend David, who was then working as Support Coordinator for Aids Vancouver Island,  'in my next life I want to be born with no social conscience!'   I didn't want to have such an awareness of the difficulties people face. I didn't want to see and feel so much pain.  Well, that thought didn't last long-  within the quarter hour I had reneged on my wish.

Not to feel intensly would be a life from hell.  Not to feel deep compassion when confronted with pain and injustice would be a shallow existence, indeed.

Okay- this very long blog entry is winding down. As is generally the case, it has assumed a life of its own.  You may never have guessed that these words grew from my anxiety around having the first public showing of my photographs.

Sensitive and creative, we 21/3s often present the outward appearance of confidence, while in fact we can be crushed by self-doubt and insecurity, not feeling up to the task.  

So, here I am, wondering and worrying

Are my photographs good enough?  Who do I think I'm fooling?!   blah blah blah

As I was creeping along this thin wire, my friend Laurie sent me this beautiful email.

'I can see being anxious and worried about a show. Yet why? The scenarios you might consider are no doubt endless and how can you know what will unfold? Be here now with your images, have faith in their beauty and the joy you had creating them, and let the wind have its way.'

So, here is an early-bird invitation

      Jackie Saunders-Ritchie
        Patrice Snopkowski

uncommon beauty: photographs

          Sunday,  May 1

     2716 Thompson Avenue
in the studio in the back garden

                       some of these photographs will be in our show

'All great discoveries are made by those whose feelings run ahead of their thinking.'
                                                                              C.H. Pankhurst                        

                   and......... let the wind have it's way

Sunday, 13 March 2016

what's important

Brian and I have recently returned from Montreal where we celebrated my great-nephew's Bar Mitzvah.  Mark is the son of my youngest niece, Miriam, and her husband, Michael.

It was an enormous joy to share the pride and love.  The sense of family and belonging.

My sister's three daughters were there and I was aware of my own daughters' absence-  Sat-Sung unable to travel from Israel and for Hilary, the dates conflicting with a major dance performance of our granddaughter in Vancouver.

With the geographical diversity and various commitments of our family, it will take some planning to get us all together in one place.  However, since being in Montreal, I feel the necessity of a fuller connection.  I see the possibility of visiting with some of our family and not waiting for the Big Reunion.

It is important.

Although Brian thinks the following sections are rather trite, I've decided that my blog can be banal and conventional as well as serious and thoughtful.  

It's my page!

So, today, here is what's important to me-  (not in any ascending or descending order of importance)

~ good health ~  family ~  love ~  compassion ~  joy and kindness  ~
~ safety ~  shelter  ~   hope ~   honesty and trust
~ curiosity ~ wonder ~  passion ~  creativity
~ generosity ~  laughter and tears
~ companionship ~ peace
~ stillness and silence ~ sensitivity
~ listening and being listened to~  noticing small things ~ seeing the Big Picture ~ ~curiosity
~ silliness

Here is what's special too-

             morning dew on a spider's web ~  the smells of springtime ~

mist above the ocean's wave ~

birds nesting ~   smooth stones beneath fragile shells ~
hope following disappointment ~  respect from the heart

~moving from fear to understanding ~

                                   ~a cat's soft purr ~

~  looking through my camera's lens

the heart sculpture is at the Montreal Museum of Fine Arts